TUNA SURPRISE

John McCain has a secret plan.

At last night's presidential debate McCain said, "I'll get Osama bin Laden, my friends. I'll get him. I know how to get him."

Of course, he won't say how. That would tip off bin Laden.

This reminds me of Richard Nixon. Running for president in 1968, he said he had a plan that would end the war in Vietnam, without losing. He never used the words "secret plan," but he never said what the plan was. That would tip off the enemy. Still, it helped him win the election. It turned out that the secret was that he had no plan.

This reminds me of my first wife's tuna surprise. She would say she was making "tuna surprise" for dinner. Then, she'd bring out hot dogs. I'd ask what happened to the tuna surprise. And she'd say, "Surprise! There's no tuna!"