IN POLITICS...

Oklahomans will choose a new governor on Tuesday.

A headline in last Sunday's Tulsa World read, "OKLAHOMA'S NEXT GOVERNOR FACES MENTAL HEALTH CRISIS."

So no matter who is elected, they're gonna' go nuts.

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Also on the ballot, State Question 755 would ban Sharia law in Oklahoma.

That should put an end to all the local stonings and beheadings we've been hearing about lately.

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ANOTHER DELAWARE WINGNUT

"The exact phrase 'separation of Church and State' came out of Adolph Hitler's mouth, that's where it comes from. So the next time your liberal friends talk about the separation of Church and State ask them why they're Nazis."
-- Delaware Congressional candidate Glen Urquhart

WHEN RABBIS FLY

Dr. Eli Landau has written "The White Book." It is a pork cookbook. Landau is an Israeli Jew.

Pork is not kosher. It's not even legal in some parts of Israel. You can't raise pigs in Israel, except for scientific purposes. But you can then eat them after you study them. Sort of like the Japanese and whaling.

Israeli butchers have had their shops burned down for selling pork. That's what's known as Israeli barbecue.

To order pork in a restaurant, you have to ask for "the white steak."

Reviews for "The White Book" are rolling in. Here are a couple.

• Rabbi Shimon Felix: "There's something childish to being so naughty. It's more mature and adult to look at this as an ancient tradition."
• Rabbi Yuval Cherlow: I'm very disappointed by this book. I'm very sorry and it hurts me."

Yes, but it tastes so good.

The book, published in Tel Aviv, has sold about 2,000 copies, not bad in a country of 7.6 million. Why so much acceptance? Rabbi Felix says, "It's perceived as being from Tel Aviv, and what goes on in Tel Aviv, nobody cares."

Sort of like Americans and Las Vegas.

(NYT)

Art Gilmore's was a voice you've probably heard. He voiced coming attractions from ths 1940s into at least the 70s. Here's an Art Gilmore quiz. For what classic pictures did he record these promotional lines?

• "The screen jumps for joy with Glendon Swarthout's inside story of those uproatious Easter vacations."
• "Never before has any film contained such a full measure of the joy of living."
• "This could be the beginning of the end of the human race."
• "The story of a love so powerful it broke through all the barriers past and present, between life and death; between the golden girl in the bank tower and the tawdry redhead that he tried to remake in her image."

And the answers:

• Where the Boys Are
• It's a Wondergul Life
• The War of rhe Worlds
• Vertigo

Art Gilmore died last month. He was 98.

In the field in Afghanistan, women Marines seem to be better at winning the hearts and minds and collecting information from men than than the male Marines. As G Company captain Brandon Turner puts it, "You put a lady in front of them, they'll start blabbing at the mouth."

Men.

They're the same everywhere.

There's also an intimidation factor. Lance Corporal Emily Naslund says, "I'd be nervous, too, if I had five chicks in my living room with weapons.

(NYT)

OH, BABY, BABY IT'S A WILD WORLD!

Last month we got hits from:

• Japan
• Taiwan
• Canada
• Luxembourg
• Germany
• Brazil
• Russia
• Latvia
• China
• and the U.S. of A.

Hello world!