I've learned an important lesson from Senator Larry Craig, busted for hitting on a cop at Minneapolis-Saint Paul International.

And this is the lesson: Next time I'm in the airport men's room, sitting on the pot and waiting for my bowels to move, I must remember to never, ever ever tap my foot.

Here in Oklahoma, the Yukon United Methodist Church of the Good Shepard it throwing its annual Ooze Fest. Each year a crowd from the greater Oklahoma City area comes to wallow in a huge mud pit, followed by a hot dog cookout.

Admission is $4. T-shirts are $10. Proceeds benefit Youth Services missionary programs.

The youth praise team will lead a worship service.

This sounds more Woodstock than worship, but I'm sure it's good dirty fun.

It is said there are only two sure things in life.

Leona Helmsley is two for two.

Leona died on Monday. She once famously said, "Only the little people pay taxes."

That was before she was convicted of income tax evasion.

Leona is buried at Sleepy Hollow Cemetery in New York. She's in a great neighborhood. Washington Irving, Andrew Carnegie and Brooke Astor are also there.

She and her late husband are in a 1,300 square foot mausoleum. That's bigger than the houses that many people live in.

Especially the little people.

The gun show was in Tulsa over the weekend. My favorite gun there was a child-size .22 caliber single shot bolt action rifle. It came in assorted colors, including pink. And you could get a marching soft gun case case that read, in embroidery, "My first rifle."

I wish I'd had one of these when I was a kid. Not in pink, though.

Future ex-presidential advisor Karl Rove made the rounds of the TV talk shows last Sunday. Here's some of what he had to say.

On NBC's "Meet the Press," David Gregory asked about the downward slide of the Republican party.

Karl: "Well, look, everyone who identifies with the Republican Party ought to, ought to, ought to feel some responsibility." (But it wasn't specifically his fault.)

David: "Why did you push to fire some U.S. attorneys in the president's second term?"

Karl: "I know you don't understand you're being an agent of Congress when you ask me that question. But you are." (And it wasn't his fault.)

David asked if Rove owed Valerie Wilson an apology for outing her as a C.I.A. agent.

Karl: "No." (It wasn't his fault.)

Chris Wallace on "Fox News Sunday" asked why in the world Rove would do a rap act as "M.C. Rove" at the White House Correspondents' Association dinner in March.

Karl: "They dragged me up there." (It wasn't his fault).

On "Face the Nation, CBS's Bob Schieffer asked why Rove was even subjecting himself to the Sunday morning TV talk shows.

Karl: "Somebody else made the decision for me. I'm just doing what I was instructed to do." (It wasn't his fault.)

School is back in session here and I'm driving the darlings to class again.

As we like to say in the school bus biz, "The future of America rides on my bus."

I've seen the future, and America is in deep trouble.

Six Italians were shot to death in Germany, a result of a feud between two Italian crime families that began, police say, when members of one family threw eggs at the other at a Carnival celebration.

Sure, food fights are fun until it gets out of hand and someone gets hurt.

Yakov Semichan is the owner and barber at Al's Barbershop on Coney Island Avenue in Brooklyn, New York. Zufigar Ali Kahn is the other barber. Yakov is a Russian Jew. Zufigar is a Pakistani Muslim. Signs in the shop window are in more than one language. One sign says, "We speak English, Russian, Yiddish and Urdu."

What a country!

I mean Brooklyn.

West Virginia University is number one on The Princeton's Review's annual list of the top 20 party schools.

Locally, Oral Roberts University has again this year failed to make the list.

A headline from today's CNN website:

"Bears eat man at beer festival."

'Nuff said.

Edna Parker of Indiana is the newest oldest person in the world. She is 114.

She succeeds Yone Mingawa of Japan who died last Monday. Yone was also 114.

Yone was preceded by Emme Faust Tillman of the United states, who also died at 114.

I'm seeing a pattern here, and I'm not understanding it.

Sorry I haven't posted lately. I've been vacationing in Buenos Aires, Argentina with mi marida.

We ate, we drank, we explored the city. We nursed coffees in cafes and watched the people-parade outside.

We befriended stray dogs and petted strange cats.

And we shopped.

We shopped in Argentina. We shopped in Uruguay. We shopped on the boat between Argentina and Uruguay, coming and going.

My wife says shopping is the best way to learn a country's culture and customs.

There are cats in Argentina's Recoleta Cemetery. Live ones.

They lurk among the magnificent mausoleums and sun themselves among the tourists. Some are friendly. When I petted a grey tabby, three tuxedo cats came to compete for my affection. And later, a long-haired calico crawled into my lap and purred madly.

Caretakers feed the cats daily. As of 3 August, 2007, there were 61-cats. Most of them have names. When a new cat shows up it is neutered and released into the population. They receive medical attention as needed.

The cats are well cared for. As they should be.

The Buenos Aires Herald reported last week that 80-year old Juan Sandor was found alive, in a body bag, on the way to a Buenos Aires morgue.

Days later, 3-hour old Brisa Milagros was found alive in a Buenos Aires morgue when a doctor heard her cry.

Then there's 19-year-old Rufina Cambaceres, buried in Recoleta Cemetery May 31st, 1902. Legend has it that a few days later workers heard screams from the tomb. By the time they got to her she was dead, but there were scratches on the coffin lid from trying to escape.

Hey, it could have happened.

Mothers' Day would come, and then Fathers' Day, and I'd ask my father, "When is Children's Day?"

And he would say, "Every day is Children's Day."

That answer never satisfied me.

But Argentina has a Children's Day. This year it was 12August. It's celebrated every year.

As it should be.